MARTIE PARTY TIP: SECRETS OF A PROFESSIONAL PARTY THROWER

MY TOP TEN ESSENTIAL ELEMENTS TO A GOOD PARTY

Some parties are hits. The lucky guests talk about them for weeks afterwards and you sit in envy, wondering why you weren’t on that guest list. Other parties never quite get off the ground. You know the ones I am referring to— you spend the whole evening looking at your watch, trying to make any excuse to go while silently cursing the money you spent on a new dress. When you host a party, no matter whether it is at home or another venue, it should express your style and personality, it should be fun (obviously) and it should be memorable. What makes a good party? While there is no magic recipe, most really good parties have a few fundamental items in common: imagination, personality, and plenty of advance planning. Here are ten essential elements to think about as you plan your next party. 

1. PERSONALIZE YOUR PARTY

It is really important to put your own spin on your party. Add something to make it uniquely yours. Are you a greenie? Make your party eco-friendly by using sustainable products. Are you a music nut? Showcase your favorite artists or tunes by making different mixes and give copies as favors or even invite your favorite emerging artist to play. Like cooking? Send guests home with a small potted herb along with a recipe using it. You get the picture. Make it yours. 

2. DO SOMETHING A LITTLE DIFFERENT

Go out on a limb and try something new instead of the same tired old cocktail party. Throw a new spin on your annual party and your friends will talk about it until next year. Need some ideas? How about a ‘wine around the world’ party where guests bring a wine and a dish from a country they have visited or a place they’d like to go. Another fun idea is a “Top Chef” competition where everyone makes their favorite dish or an annual chili cook-off or other food throwdown.  

3. GET HELP

One sure party killer is a frantic hostess. Give yourself plenty of time to prepare and once the party starts, try to relax and enjoy the party. If you don’t hire help, ask several reliable friends to help with essentials like ice, pouring drinks, and clearing dishes. Assign jobs for no more than one hour so your friends can actually have some fun, too. For me, it is money well spent to have paid help on party day- even if it is a college student to help bus dishes, keep ice buckets filled and empty garbage cans. As a hostess in a pretty party dress, garbage duty should not be on your to-to list.

 4. THE INVITATION IS INFORMATION

In addition to letting your guests know when and where, your invitation should also give guests an idea of what will happen at the party and how they should dress, especially if the party is outside or if special clothing or costumes are required. Email invitations and e-vites are fine, but a personal note, printed invitation, or phone call is still the best way to invite guests. Include a phone number for regrets or request an RSVP if you need an exact head count for food, beverages, favors, etc. 

 5. UP THE NUMBERS

Invite more people than you want to attend. Typically three guests in twenty are no-shows. Have a diverse mix of people and always invite new people to keep things interesting. If you’re inviting a group of people who have never met one another, it is essential to greet your guests at the door to make introductions. Have drinks or a bar close by to let people have a chance to settle in and feel comfortable as the festivities get underway. 

6. START AND STOP

Set an exact start and end time for your party to insure your guests don’t straggle in or stay too late. Guests typically show up 30 minutes or more after your stated start time because nobody wants to be the first to arrive. Ask a few good friends to arrive early to help kick things off. Ask someone to corral those last remaining die-hard party guests and get them out the door when you’re ready to call it a night.    

7. TURN DOWN THE LIGHTS

If your budget doesn’t allow for a lot of decorations, simply dim the lights and light candles. Replace some of the light bulbs in your lamps with soft pink bulbs which give the same effect as candlelight. You can get them at any home improvement chain store. Fresh flowers can be expensive but are totally worth it. Use whatever your florist has that is plentiful, fresh, and cheap. Use a variety of vases (short, tall, round, square- whatever you have) and use only one type or one color of flower. Cluster them in groups or use them individually. A bowl or vase of limes (or other fruit) makes a striking centerpiece and by using what you have on hand, it makes decorating easy, too. A large grouping of the same item looks modern and stylish. If you develop a good relationship with your local florist, you may be able to get a deal on gently used flowers that you can repurpose for your party. 

8. THE MUSIC MATTERS

Music plays a big role in the overall mood and ambience. Start with a mix of low-key tunes, increasing the volume and the beat as the night goes on and noise levels intensify. Give guests time to mix, mingle, and talk, then increase the tempo as the party progresses. Make playlists of your favorites that will play continuously for hours. If you have the budget and space for great live music or a quality DJ, hire them. They will take your party to the next level and take the worry of entertaining your guests off your list.

  9. GOOD AND PLENTY

Most people don’t come to a party specifically for the food, but if the food is bad, or there isn’t enough of it, there will be complaints. Make sure to plan for more ice, drinks, food, and utensils than you think you need. Some caterers recommend padding your order by ten percent. Many will automatically add ten percent because they look bad if you underestimate your guest list and run out of food. I am very cautious about having enough food so I always prepare or order up to twenty percent more than I think I will need and replenish dishes frequently to keep them fresh. If I have food left over, I send helpful friends home with a care package. For large events, take leftover food that has been properly stored to a local shelter. 

10. THE ENTERTAINMENT

It is always a good idea to have activities planned to keep people engaged Do something simple that doesn’t require a lot of explanation. For example, give each guest a printed card when they arrive with ten easy questions about other guests. They must go around the room and interact with one another to get the answers. Give prizes for the first three to complete their cards. There are lots of ways to entertain your guests depending on the theme or type of party you are having. Everything from contests and card games to karaoke and Wii can get people involved and interacting.  

How did you personalize your party? I’d love to hear about it!

PARTY THEME: HOST A MOTHER & DAUGHTER AFTERNOON TEA PARTY

Remember when your mom did something special with just you and made a big fuss over it? The day my mom and I went to a fancy “dress up” afternoon tea is a still a very fond memory for me even though she made my hair look like a big doughnut on top of my head. With Mother’s Day just around the corner, why not host a Mom and Me tea party to make some memories of your own? This is a great party idea for mothers and daughters of all ages. A tea party isn’t expensive and the results can be priceless—the memories truly do last a lifetime.

Take a look at these pictures from a tea party hosted by a women’s group. The annual event is designed to give busy mothers an opportunity to spend quality time with their young daughters. This family affair was a fashion affair, too. Guests arrived wearing color coordinated outfits complete with hats for the Saturday afternoon soiree. No matter if your party is for a big crowd or your own family, here’s all you need to know to host a tea party. This is also a great theme for a birthday party, a neighborhood party or a fund-raiser for your local school or church. Getting dressed up is half of the fun so invite guests to dress in their Sunday best and encourage them to go all out by competing for prizes in a best hat contest. 

Invite guests to dress in their Sunday best. At this party, families coordinated their colors and styles. Prizes were given for best hat!

THE FOOD

A proper afternoon tea includes both savory and sweet treats. Menu items include tiny tea sandwiches like egg salad, cucumber or watercress, savory cheese puffs and warm scones served with butter, jam, and Devonshire cream. You can find Devonshire cream at Whole Foods and upscale markets. Petit fours, cookies, and other delicate cakes are always the finale of high tea. While this isn’t a  day you want to worry about calories, do include a few healthy choices like fruit for those guests dedicated to eating healthy or with dietary concerns. Include an assortment of flavored teas for the kids; they like fruit flavored or spice tea varieties. If you don’t want to make or bake yourself, buy everything you need at the bakery and grocery. Use an electric tea kettle to bring water to a boil quickly; it makes pouring the scalding water into your teapots much easier, too.

Try some of my easy recipes for your party: Classic Cheese Puffs, Ham Delights, Puff Pastry Palmiers, Strawberry Napoleons, Raspberry Lemonade and Zippy Two Cheese Pimento Cheese.

DECORATIONS

This is a marvelous reason to break out the good china! If you don’t have enough china, borrow from your friends and mix and match the patterns. A tea  party isn’t terribly expensive and if you don’t feel like cooking, you don’t have to. Use tiered trays stacked with colorful cakes, cookies, and pretty sandwiches as centerpieces. You really don’t need anything more since there will be quite a lot loaded onto your tables. If you want to add flowers and don’t have a lot of extra room, just place flowers directly on or under serving pieces.

ENTERTAINMENT

Plan a few games for all ages including a best hat contest with winners in biggest, most creative and most unusual hat categories. Prizes can be chocolates, teapots and other tea accessories. Another game for all ages is “what’s in Mom’s purse?” This is a type of seated scavenger hunt. Unusual items are called out and the first person to dig the item out of their purse wins a prize. The typical movie stub and bank receipt were obviously easy finds, but I was shocked when moms actually pulled a map of Paris, a curling iron, an unused birthday card, and a pineapple “dum-dum” sucker out of their purses!

Great fun for a crowd of fifty or a group of four, this type of party can easily be used as a fund-raising event for a club, school, church or community or a fun Saturday activity for you and your favorite little girl.

PARTY THEME: HOST A BACHELORETTE BEACH SPA PARTY

They bought the dress, pitched in on the shower, purchased a wedding gift, and some even had to spring for an airline ticket to the wedding city. And now there’s the bachelorette party to plan. A trendy bachelorette trip to Vegas or Miami would be memorable, but if you can’t justify the expense, how about planning a spa getaway at home for the bachelorette party fling? A “what happens in the ‘backyard stays in the backyard” bachelorette party is a lot of fun and you won’t have to hassle with airport delays, long security lines, and taking even more days off from work for wedding festivities! After a day in the ‘spa’ head out to a night on the town complete a limousine—now that’s a bachelorette party any bride will love! This party theme is great for so many occasions: a birthday party, a baby shower for that new mom, girls night in party, or a farewell party for a friend who is leaving town.

Use a pop up tent to create a quiet spa area with drapes and tropical plants.

CREATE AN OASIS

A day at a spa doesn’t really allow for much quality time together. Hosting the party at someone’s home is a better way to hang out with best friends before the big day. Select a place with a lot of space. A pool, tranquil fountain area, or large patio is the perfect place. Whether you go DIY and take turns giving manicures and facials using a prepackaged spa kit or hire a mobile massage therapist like we did, start by dedicating a space for treatments. We used a pop-up tent as our treatment room complete with flowing white outdoor curtains, candles, and soft music. We didn’t buy anything— we used items we had to make our spa area feel special including some potted plants and plush robes. The massage therapist supplied the oils, lotions, linens and massage table. Bridesmaids should cover the cost of the bride’s treatments. The service provider will often give the bride a complimentary treatment with the purchase of a certain number of treatments. Make sure to hire someone licensed with appropriate insurance. It is always best to hire a vendor you know and trust.  

Order retro cool pool party decor from Oriental Trading Company. Add an oversized striped beach towel as a tablecloth to make decorating easy.

DECORATIONS AND PARTY SWAG BAGS

If you don’t have the luxury of a lot of space, clear out some furniture for the party and dedicate a room for your ‘spa’ area. Create a kitschy cool vibe with lots of cheap decorations.  We wanted a Hawaiian theme for our party— and wanted to do something completely campy since it was a bachelorette party. We found inflatable palm trees, colorful leis and vibrant beach towels to anchor the decorating theme. Oriental Trading has everything you’ll need. Be resourceful with your decorations and use what you have on  hand when possible. I forgot a tablecloth for our snack table so I used two striped beach towels for a tablecloth and they worked perfectly.  Quirky melamine serving platters were inexpensive and worked perfectly for the outdoor setting and can be used again later. Add string lights, lanterns or candles for a festive glow if your party is in the evening. Each bridesmaid received a gift bag filled with inexpensive treats from the dollar store. Flip flops, scented spa body butter, sunscreen, and lip balm for the day’s festivities and really cheesy light-up necklaces for the evening’s festivities were placed in reusable tote bags in party colors.

Hit up the dollar store for swag bag items your guests can use during the party and afterwards. Sunscreen, lotion, sunglasses, flip flops and more make great favors.

MENU

Since this spa party was a “pre-party” to our night on the town bachelorette party, we opted for “spa cuisine” like wraps, veggies, and fresh fruit. Have beverages ready to pour when guests arrive. Provide an assortment of drinks so guests have plenty of options and stay hydrated. Serve iced tea or perhaps fruit flavored water called agua fresca along with your cocktails.  So that nobody gets stuck with bartending duties, pre-mixed a signature cocktail in pitchers or a dispenser. Serve in plastic margarita glasses with a candy ring pop for garnish, perfect for the theme. We found these adorable Rice Krispy treats in the shape of a flip-flop at a shop but you could easily make these yourself.

ENTERTAINMENT

These days, couples are reconsidering some of the traditional activities that go along with a “last fling” bachelor or bachelorette party in favor of respectful rites of passage from single to married life. That doesn’t mean there still can’t be fun and games! After our spa treatments and a cocktail hour, we hired a limo to pick up our group for a night on the town at a favorite restaurant followed by dancing until dawn. A limousine not only alleviates the issue of driving, you feel like a rock star when  you arrive. Some limo companies have bachelorette VIP packages available with your limo rental that may include special club admissions, etc. We adorned our bride-to-be with some of the traditional bachelorette party finery including a furry pink light up “I’m the Bride” tiara and layers of paper leis. How far do you go with decorations and debauchery? Only you know the limits for embarrassing your best friend. Just make sure whatever entertainment you plan, it won’t cause relationship issues in the light of day.

This party was a breeze to pull together because we divvied up the work load. Most of the food is available pre-made at the grocery if you don’t have time to make it yourself. To save time and gas, simply go online to shop and you can get everything you need for this party in just a few clicks! What could be easier?  You are all set for your bachelorette getaway without leaving town.

Photography: Arden Ward/Arden Photography